Flint Tan

This is the very first time in my life I've felt so lost. Losing something that has been with you for 5 years. I don't know, it still feels so unreal, it all feels like a dream. Tears just cannot explain just how hurtful this is. Last night was just a nightmare. I just wished last night didn't existed. If I could just go back to yesterday, I would protect you with all my life and avert this disaster, Flint.

I've missed you so much already. I really want to see you back in the cage popping your head out to see me whenever I come home. No one's gonna pop her lil head out to see who's home. No cute little girl is gonna run all over the house at super speed and pooping everywhere. No one to share bits of apple/lettuce/cucumber/grapes/watermelon. You've always loved them as treats.

You won't be running all over the house, and you won't get to go to my room anymore. You won't be around to comfort me. Just showing me your cute eyes is enough. Also, running all over the house, scaring Mummy sometimes making her shriek and I would just laugh.

I won't be able to tell you stories. When I was younger, remember I told you the story of three little pigs? Haha. I just won't be able to forget the very first day we brought you into our lives, that was when I was in primary 4. Going down the escalator, Daddy holding you in the cage. I was so elated, people staring with eyes - what's that? Brought you home, telling you repeatedly your name was Flint. You gave us the blur face, haha. You just melted me. Did you love your huge name that we painted on the wall above you? Because I did. And how you had to stay at home alone for days when we went for holidays. Gave you extra lots of food, you ate them up so quickly. Greedy pig, I miss you. Now you're so fatfat and cute, I love calling you Fatty.

That very night, you were just running around the house, playing. I kept calling 'Fatty, come out. Om nom nom.' I stoned at you stoning. Then I went out to watch tv, you came out and run in the living room. You were tired.

All this doesn't even seem real. Seriously, it doesn't. You were such a small, delicate baby of ours. How could you leave us. And how could you leave the earth so painfully? I just can't forget the heartbreaking moments that happened to quickly. So much memories together as a family couldn't be summed up into here. But I was glad the family could just be around you as you drew your last breath.

Flint, you'll be dearly missed by us. I've always loved you, and still will. I'm glad you were at least able to spend half your life with us.